Wasted Years

Test results came back negative - you're good.

For the last two days, I've walked through the Seventh Level of Hell and it's outlying territories and have had the distinct impression I'm walking through either a morgue or a zombie movie.

In the face of a $9 million short fall, due to the state of Illinois throwing education under the bus in an attempt to ease it's own budget woes, the administration recommended and the board approved 560 layoffs. That's a quarter of our staff.

A quarter. The majority of the 560 layoffs is coming from our teaching staff and they received their official RIF notices yesterday. Walking through a building yesterday afternoon was like walking among the dead - teachers with dead eyes going about their day, trying to continue in their duties as part of a completely broken system. And believe me, this system is broken.

Until we stop teaching to a test, stop teaching our kids to memorize things, and stop underfunding the educational system in this country, it is broken. Until we actually start embracing our children, their abilities, and their interests, the system is broken. Until we stop listening to every half-assed politician with the next great plan to solve the educational system's deficiencies, it's going to stay broken.

We can't rely on politicians to fix this disaster because there are only two things that interest them - money and power. Most politicians, once elected, are immediately overcome with sweeping amnesia that blows all the promises they made on the campaign trail right out of their heads. Accept this one nugget of truth - they don't give a fuck about us. We're only votes to them. And they certainly don't give a fuck about our children. In Illinois, Governor Quinn's budget that slashes $1 billion from education funding is proof of that.

Oh, but wait! If income taxes are increased we can save education funding!

Whatever - don't piss down my back and tell me it's raining. If a tax increase goes through, once those assholes in Springfield have more money they'll blow it on more worthless legislation. It'll be spent in three months. And we'll be right back where we are now - the state trying to get out of debt on the backs of our kids.

So what's the answer? I don't know. What I do know is that we can no longer afford to deprive our children of the quality education they deserve. Or the teachers needed to give them that education.

So today is Xmas in September. Yay.

Just not in much of a celebratory mood.

It'll pass and hopefully I'll be somewhat back to myself by the weekend.

We briefly interrupt your usual web surfing for a word from Dave.

Fuck.

That is all. Had this been a real post, the word above would've been accompanied by others such as shit, cocksucker, bitch, and/or kumquat.

It's been 40 years since man first set foot on the moon, an achievement the likes of which has yet to be matched in terms of ingenuity and dedication. We learned a great deal from Apollo, but there is still one question that boggles me.

Why the hell did we stop?

We need to get back some of what we lost in the 40 years since Apollo 11. We need to challenge ourselves to return to the moon and go beyond. Hopefully NASA's plans don't fall by the wayside under our current administration. If NASA can't do it, the private sector should step in.

It's a shame mankind's "Giant Leap" didn't get us very far.

When I hear about things like this, my death penalty support skyrockets.

After putting Jada to bed on June 12, Castillo and Tkachik snorted several lines of heroin before they went to sleep, the affidavit said.

About 11 a.m. the following morning, Castillo woke up to check on Jada. Tkachik told investigators he saw Castillo spanking Jada and pulling her hair. Jada was not crying so, according to Tkachik, Castillo hit Jada even harder.

Tkachik told investigators that Castillo slapped Jada, causing her to fall against a table. The impact gave the toddler a small cut on her head. Castillo put Jada in her room and beat on her again, according to the affidavit.

Beating the child to death wasn't enough though. These miserable bastards then tried burning her body and ultimately encased her in concrete.

You're free to have your opinion on why execution is an inhumane punishment for murderers, but I ask you - what was humane about how these two people (one the little girl's cousin! Family!) treated Jada Justice?

They deserve to burn in hell - sooner, rather than later.

Brad told me about this site, Texts From Last Night, which showcases texts that more likely than not should never go beyond the phones they're sent from and received on.

Some of the texts are pretty amusing - A few of my faves so far:

"(610): The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem."

"(978): I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it."

"(702): What? How drunk are you?
(1-702): elementary watson bafflding! I going to go live inthe fridge wit the polar bears. write me. postage costs xtra in kichenaides."

That's just a small sampling... if you're looking for something to put a smile on your face, check it out.

I'm looking for an artist to assist with creating a book cover.

If anyone is interested, or knows someone who might be interested, my contact info is at the bottom of the right sidebar.

Thanks!

Forgive the 'Hey Brad' post.

It was brought to you by heavy congestion, body aches, and cold medicine.

This might as well be a three day weekend since that's usually when I get sick.

On the up side of things, we're supposed to have another heat wave this weekend. That's right kids, we're hittin' the 30s! If I feel better, I might head down to the lake and go for a swim before it gets cold again.

Our state senate gave Governor Go-Blow-A-Bitch the heave-ho and banned him from holding a political office ever again. Unfortunately the damage has been done - the new Gov is probably going to raise taxes.

Not his fault though - blame Mr. New York Media Junket.

Don't blame the new guy - it's not his fault he just inherited a steaming pile of shit. I just hope he has a damn big shovel.

Police: Mexican woman in wheelchair flees on foot

I've been watching the news constantly since Israel marched into Gaza over the weekend - something I rarely do - and was flabbergasted when a CNN reporter asked an Israeli representative about Israel's timetable for its military action. It's my favorite question of all time - how long do you plan on this taking?

Right... because the IDF has it all mapped out to the second.

Today at work someone made a comment about Israel starting trouble again and they're always starting trouble in that part of the world. That statement pissed me off. Really? I was under the impression that this was all in response to Hamassholes launching rockets into Israel... I didn't realize that Israel woke up one day and decided to pound the shit out of Gaza for no reason. Why is everything Israel's fault?

My thoughts are somewhat scattered on the whole situation. On one hand I feel bad for the civilians caught in the middle. On the other, I say good for Israel - they've dealt with this bullshit long enough.

Thoughts? What do you think?

/end ramble

Goodbye 2008! I will not be missing you anytime soon.

It's been a miserable year across the board, no doubt about it. The only high points of the year for me were three visits from Bea, one of which surprised the hell out of me and made this year's Mambo the best ever. Another in July for Heatwave and then again in September for my birthday. Bea - honestly, your visits saved this year from being a complete waste of 366 days! Thanks for visiting and helping to recharge my FOAD batteries! You better get your ass back here in '09!

The rest of the year (for me anyway) was shit. Well, except for November and my 53,000 word novel. That was a blast too. Thankfully 2008 be over in less than 2 hours.

I wish all of you the best in 2009 - may it piss on the ashes of 2008's funeral pyre.

It's a day late, but I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and were able to spend a lot of time with your families!

If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go hit the leftovers.

This is the big news in Illinois today.

I'm happy to see our worthless governor is finally getting his comeuppance. I hope he goes away for a long time.

Smile big for Bubba!

Howdy!

When we last got together for a palaver, I was getting ready to dive in to NaNoWriMo. With five days to go, I'm at 42,103 words - much better than the last time I participated (Only 25,306 words). I'm confident that I'll make the 50,000 word mark by the 30th as long as I can stick to my writing schedule. So for the next couple of days, I will once again resemble this fellow:

I'd just like to take a moment and thank everyone who has offered their support this year as well as thank everyone for their understanding since I have essentially been living off the grid for the majority of the month. When this is all over, I'll get back to emailing, being sociable, and living away from the keyboard.

I will also sleep again, since the only time I have to write is at night and bedtime hasn't come before midnight this month, except for three nights I passed out on the couch.

I'm excited - this is a big deal for me! I'm also trying to remember what I did with my time before NaNo... it's all a bit of a haze right now.

See you after 50K.

Author Michael Crichton dead at 66.

A piece on the author of 'Jurassic Park' can be found here.

Figured I'd actually post something since two of my three readers are chomping at the bit.

My trip to California was awesome, except for the flight out there. Walking around Apple was a treat in several ways, but the best part was our tour of the reliability lab. After seeing what Apple hardware endures at the hands of engineers, I will never buy another Windows-based piece of hardware. I would very much like to work at Apple and move to California. Neither of which strikes me as a viable possibility, so I'll move on.

Work is still work. The phrase 'Hurry up and wait' comes to mind quite often.

The rest of my life is okay, if a little infuriating at times. In one area in particular, knowing what I want to say but not knowing when to say it or if it's even worth it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. Constantly.

Anyone else happy that this election madness is almost over? Anyone else ever wonder how many starving families could be fed for the amount of money that these so-called candidates have spent on their campaigns? Especially the Messiah's half hour infomercial... how many meals could that have bought?

And today is the first day of NaNoWriMo. I'm participating this year. I think. So I should probably go pound out 1,667 words tonight. Which I will go work on right now.

The phone calls will stop.
The TV ads will disappear.
The back and forth bullshit game will be done for another four years.

And that's all it really is - A bullshit game. Politicians lie all the time to get voted in and then they lie to keep their jobs. The Obamessiah's followers charge forth under his call for change. Really? What candidate hasn't promoted change in an election cycle? Give me a break.

Over and over I have asked his supporters to provide me with examples of what he has accomplished for the state of Illinois during his term as senator and how that makes him capable of being president. So far, I've gotten the runaround, been accused of being a racist, been accused of supporting McCain, and yelled at. Not a single fucking person has answered that simple fucking question for me.

But I should vote for Obama because he's going to bring change to Washington. Oh, and voting for McCain is voting for another four years of Bush. Really? Joe Biden stated in 2004 that he would support a Kerry/McCain ticket if it were to happen as it would be good for the country. If McCain is really as bad as Bush, why would Biden have made such a statement? What's changed in the last four years?

And then we have McCain... a $5,000 tax credit on health benefits... which might cover the taxes that everyone will pay on employer-sponsored insurance. The fact that he supports any form of government involvement in health benefits, even if it is a supposed 'tax credit', leaves me rocking back and forth in a corner sucking my thumb. Although if he gets elected we can all have fun playing drinking games whenever his VP gives a speech.

Maverick!

The one good thing I can say about McCain is that I haven't gotten the runaround, been accused of being a racist, been accused of supporting Obama, or yelled at by any of his supporters when asking what McCain has accomplished for the state of Arizona. Of course, I don't think there are too many McCain supporters around my neck of the woods. I have it on good authority though, that the people of Arizona are not very pleased with their senator either.

Honestly, the thing that bothers me the most about the upcoming election is the opinion of a coworker. As long as I've known him, I've always thought of him as a strong supporter of the Democratic party - voting for his party and whatnot. And it sounds like he's just as screwed as I am when it comes to making a decision.

Maverick!

Iowahawk shares a satirical view of the MSM's Messiah:

The Not-Really-That-Epic Poem of Obamacles

Worth a read if you're looking for a chuckle.

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Second Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Second Level of Hell
You have come to a place mute of all light, where the wind bellows as the sea does in a tempest. This is the realm where the lustful spend eternity. Here, sinners are blown around endlessly by the unforgiving winds of unquenchable desire as punishment for their transgressions. The infernal hurricane that never rests hurtles the spirits onward in its rapine, whirling them round, and smiting, it molests them. You have betrayed reason at the behest of your appetite for pleasure, and so here you are doomed to remain. Cleopatra and Helen of Troy are two that share in your fate.

It's probably not the greatest timing for me, but I started another blog. I'll be covering tech-related things there. I've been thinking about starting a tech blog for over a year now partly because I like to be helpful and partly because I might be a bit insane. Since school is starting Monday my posting will be erratic, but once things calm down I'm going to try to stick to a regular schedule.

Speaking of new endeavors, Mary has a couple of her own. She's written a book (I've read it and I think it's awesome!), sent out queries to agents, and started a website of her own. Words of encouragement should be shared since only one of those is easy. Her accomplishments have helped put a fire back into me and so I write again. Bits and pieces right now, but I feel like the damn in my head is about to burst and spill forth words down through my fingers and across the keyboard...

Way to go Mary! How's that second book coming? (hint hint)

After the past couple of shitty weeks, finding this in my inbox cracked me up:

Thanks Bea!

Spread it!

Even though it's almost the fifth, I figured I'd say it anyway.

I went downtown and caught the fireworks display. I've got to say, my hometown drops the ball on a lot of things and screws the pooch more often than not, but when it comes to the 4th of July fireworks, they go all out.

Tonight was the first time in a long time I made it out for the display and I wasn't disappointed.

I hope you all had a safe and happy 4th!

123 As a 1930s husband, I am Very Superior Take the test!

Found via Bane

That's all I can say after seeing the pics from Mambo. I uploaded them to Flickr and since some of them could get a certain person in trouble (maybe persons? Not sure...), I made them private.

Which sucks for those of you without accounts, but I've gotta look out for people here. If creating an account is a hassle and you really want to see these pics (especially the incriminating blackmail shots) stuff $500 in a plain brown envelope and drop it in my mail slot with an address for me to mail them to.

The pics can be found here.

Thought I'd mention this because quite a few people have been asking - I'm writing again. It's true!

My muse has returned from her long journey and wrapped me in a loving embrace all the while whispering sweet seductive ideas to me. And I've been listening attentively, allowing her sweet nothings to wash over me, through me, and down to the keyboard.

And it feels good.

Last week I began what hopefully will turn into a new and rewarding hobby - I'm playing photographer. A co-worker was kind enough to be my subject for my first outing and I figured out pretty quick that for me, working with people is preferable to still life.

I should have the pics back on Tuesday and I'll post them then. I'll also have Mambo pics for posting - something which scares the bejeezus out of me considering the overall level of depravity that night.

Back to my new hobby though... don't be surprised if I come knocking on your door looking for subjects. I might already have my next subject lined up provided I can get him to stand still long enough. And I'm definitely taking my camera when I go to Arizona - I've got a lot of ideas for pics and I hope Bea is feeling photogenic!

I saw Iron Man with Dax on Friday. I was never a big Iron Man fan, but seeing the previews and hearing the reviews made me curious. I am damn glad I was curious - that movie is awesome!

I enjoyed it so much, I'm planning on seeing it again first chance I get. If you're an Iron Man fan and haven't seen it yet - what the hell is wrong with you? Git! Even if you're not a fan, check it out. I don't think you'll be disappointed.

I've been asked a few times now by different people how Echo is doing:

He has launched well over two hundred attacks on me using guerrilla hit and fade tactics, striking my legs and killing my toes. He attacks from shelves, under the bed, and once scared the crap out of me by leaping out at me from under the dirty clothes in my laundry basket.

He woke me up this morning by stabbing me in the lips with his claws - accidentally, but damn! He demands attention by jumping up and hanging on to my pant leg, which is fine when I have jeans on but sucks when I'm still in pajama pants.

He's doing great and will soon be off to see the samurai veterinarian for the visit that will leave him half the cat he used to be.

Kim and her little brother are bowling tomorrow but there's still time to help Kim reach her fund raising goal.

If you've got a couple of dollars to spare, please consider donating to this worthy cause.

Thanks!

Bea had her baby on Wednesday!

Aliyah Teresa weighed in at 7 pounds, 3 ounces.

Congrats!

Since it actually is the 14th now...

Valentine's Day is dog shit.

Bah humbug.

(Bumping this to the top for maximum exposure. New posts are below this one.)

A friend of mine from work is trying to raise money for Big Brothers Big Sisters. More information on BBBS and it's programs can be found here.

If you have a few dollars to spare, Kim's page is here.

Thanks!

If you've been coming around for awhile, you probably noticed that this blog was suffering from massive page load times. I finally tracked it down to an old script that was running and I think (think, mind you!) I've gotten things back to a bearable load time.

If you were watching paint dry to pass the time waiting for the site to open, please be kind enough to let me know how it is for you now.

Thanks!

If you're having problems posting comments could you please email me with details.

Thanks.

Found and fixed.

Thanks Krissy!

Happy New Year everyone!

For those of you who raised my ire in '07, I hope Baby New Year pisses and shits in your cereal.

Repeatedly.

Since Kathy has nothing better to do at work than surf the internet, here's a post!

Have a puzzle.

For Christmas I could use some new instrument cables... six footers would be nice...

Oh, and maybe some new guitar strings.

And while you're at it, could you give Kathy a new car so she doesn't freeze to death while driving... yeah I know she's been rotten this year, but it's not her fault. Please don't give her coal.

Thanks big guy!

"Dumb fucking bastard mother fucker of a cunt"

Wow.

That's just...

Wow.

When I saw VK's high germ count, I was blown away while silently vowing to avoid shaking her hand if we ever meet. After figuring out my germ count, I'll be lucky if anybody ever wants to shake my hand again:

2,247,000How Many Germs Live On Your Keyboard?

If anyone needs me, I'll be holding my hands in a roaring flame for about an hour.

I've been trying to understand what a 2-year-old could possibly have done to warrant the inhumane torture (WARNING: Not an easy read) she suffered at the hands of her own mother and her mother's fat bastard slob of a husband.

I've also been trying to understand how acts of savagery such as this can occur in a "civilized" world. I wonder if a small segment of the population has always been this fucked up and we just never heard about it or if these kinds of things are representative of the downward spiral we're beginning to fall into.

I stayed very far away from centers of commerce on Friday, since it was the infamous 'Kill Others To Get To The Last One Of The Thing I Want' shopping day. My thoughts on the Black Friday madness have been summed up by this lovely lady here.

My shopping, if I do any, will consist of swift surgical strikes into specific stores at specific times of day. If I can buy it online, so be it. I am not in the mood to deal with crazed idiots who can't be bothered to remember their manners during the season of giving.

What am I doing up at 4 in the morning?

A 5 hour nap on the couch will do that to ya...

I hope you all have a great Thanksgiving and are able to spend it with family, good friends, or at the very least - people you don't hate.

I'll be off to my sister's house later today and have big plans to hide in the basement with my nephew and play Guitar Hero III.

Have a safe and happy day everyone!

The Mist, based on the novella by Stephen King, was released yesterday. I've always loved the story since it was one of the first I read that made my skin crawl. If you've never read it, The Mist follows a group of townspeople who become trapped in the local supermarket when a thick, unnatural mist falls upon the town. People who venture outside are killed by mysterious creatures that are hidden within the mist. The protagonist finds himself at odds with a religious zealot who believes the answer to their problems is a human sacrifice... I don't want to reveal too much more, but trust me when I say check it out. In my opinion, it's a good read and does a great job of portraying the personality changes of people caught in threatening situations.

While not a life-threatening situation, I found myself in a position to witness a personality shift that was completely unexpected. Back in the days of my misspent youth, a group of us piled into my car to go party at a friend's house the night before a concert. Of course we were stocked up with the necessary supplies to ensure a good time. We had barely passed out of the city limits when I was greeted by flashing lights in the rear view mirror. I was thinking quite a few unpleasant thoughts but had to push them to the side to deal with a small crisis. My buddy was riding in the back and had been smoking when we were pulled over. Not being of legal smoking age this usually calm, cool, collected individual who almost always kept his head began to go into near-hysterics over being pulled over. He was almost hyperventilating because he was positive he was going to be caught smoking and his mom was going to find out. Instead of dropping the cigarette out through the open window, he opened the back door and dropped the still smoking vessel of his guilt to the ground - a major no no with a cop sitting right behind you. Fortunately it went unnoticed, but I had had enough. I turned and blew up at him, yelling at him to calm down which is amusing to think about since I'm sure my yelling did anything but calm him down. He finally did settle down and just sat there staring straight ahead. The traffic stop wound up being a warning about the amount of stuff I had piled on the back window, and we continued on our merry way. I learned a lot about my buddy that day though... and it was good knowledge to have later on down the line.

Well, I've veered off here... started off with talking about The Mist by Stephen King and took a stroll down memory lane. The movie is in theaters now and from the trailers looks like it's a good adaptation of the story. Check it out!

I signed up to do NaNo again this year, but I haven't started my writing yet.

I'm dealing with so much shit right now, I'm not even sure if I'm going to even try. Especially since I'm facing a deficit of almost 7,000 words. I was really hoping to make it to 50,000 this year, but I'm not feeling too optimistic about it.

I reckon we'll see what tomorrow brings.

When I took Echo to the vet after finding him, the vet went over kitten care with me. I knew about bottle feeding but I wasn't prepared for the next bit of information - young kittens cannot eliminate on their own. Their muscles aren't strong enough to allow them to, so the mother cat helps by licking the kitten's genital area to provide the necessary stimulation.

Since there is no mother cat, I have to provide the stimulation. And no, you sick bastards, I am not licking the cat. I've been using a Q-Tip dipped in warm water. Which has led to all sorts of wonderful situations. I've been pissed on, shit on, and damn near had my hand scratched (apparently the water wasn't warm enough that day).

This has led to several jokes at my expense, my favorite coming from The Fearless Leader - "So now you'll be rubbing two peckers every night instead of one". Ha ha - what a funny guy.

It's not really a joke if it's true though

Here's a piece of Dave trivia for my thousands of readers (snicker)... today is the day I was supposed to be getting married. Obviously that didn't happen and until recently I was dealing with the on again, off again bumming about being single. But I've found that I enjoy being single. I still have my moments of thinking it'd be nice to have someone to share things with, but all in all being single is the best. Here's why:

1. You don't have to plan things around someone else's schedule.
2. If you want to go out for a beer or two after work, you won't hear about it when you get home.
3. You don't get treated like crap for having one beer.
4. No ridiculous arguments.
5. Being single means your schedule is wide open, making last-minute planning a snap.
6. (Hand in hand with number 5) No asking if it's OK if you make plans to do something.
7. Being able to flirt with 19 year-old secretaries and getting them to giggle (my personal fave).
8. Being able to ogle admire attractive women without fear of being caught and without guilt.
9. Having the time to do things you haven't done in a while.
10. Having the time to branch out into new activities.
11. Being able to sit back, listen to other people's tales of relationship misery, and have no similar tales to share.

Given enough time I'm sure I could probably come up with a lot more. And then again, maybe not. It does suck that I'm not getting married... I am a family-minded individual. But it'll happen when the time is right and I finally find the right person. I just hope I stop finding the wrong ones before I'm old and gray.

But after moping for a bit, being single isn't as bad as I once thought.

Welcome to a weekend time-killer. I have a new addition to the family, but haven't settled on a name. I wasn't planning on having to name a kitten, but here I am. Cast your vote and tell me what you think the kitten's name should be. This won't actually decide what I name the lil guy, but it might be interesting to see what others think. Humor me...